Why I Want My Team to Beat Your Team So Damn Bad
I have long wondered what it would feel like to win a championship - not as a player, but as a fan. While I may not have been old enough to remember the last championship that one of my favorite teams won, I will absolutely bring it up and own it like I was on the court as the clock hit zero. For the American Man, sports fandom isn't just about the score, it's about identity, origin, and belonging.
When it comes to college sports, I want my team to win because I earned the right to call myself a fan. I had to go through an application process and write essays, fill out forms, submit transcripts to prove I was worthy to be considered a member of this institution. There were other institutions that I considered becoming a member of, but in the end I chose the one that I chose because it was the best fit for me. When my college football team beats a rival school that my high school friends went to, I feel a sense of pride because I chose to attend the school that won. When top recruits choose my school, I feel proud - not just of the organization, but of the decision we both made.
Professional sports, however, occupy a different space in my mind. I feel an attachment to my pro sports teams because it reminds me of where I'm from. When my hometown team wins, I'm not excited because it represents the city I grew up in is a better city than some other city. I'm excited because so much of the identity of my hometown is rooted in this sports team. I chose my college team. My pro team chose me. As I grew up, I felt an attachment as the city was tied to this team through its ups and downs. Maybe even a little Stockholm Syndrome - sports fandom has a way of feeling like love and captivity at the same time. You have a shared experience with your peers and both the good and bad times bring you closer together.
One key distinction about college and professional teams is the fans relationship to a player. In college, athletes can only play for about 4 years and they have all the power when it comes to choosing what team to play for. There’s no real limit on how long a player can play a sport professionally, and it ends up being the player's decision when to call it quits. An athlete joins a professional sports team from college through a draft and for the most part does not have any say on which team they will be joining. Teams can also trade their players with zero regard for the player’s loyalty or the fanbase’s emotional investment. This dynamic is tough to manage as a fan. When a team you root for drafts a player, you can feel like they are growing up in the city and have grown up alongside the city like you did. When players leave to play somewhere else, it can feel like a betrayal because you feel so emotionally invested in their growth and development.
Both the decision to root for a team and the decision to not root for a team can tell you a lot about someone. For example, if I meet someone that grew up in an area with a really good professional team but doesn't follow the sport, then I know we don’t have a shared interest in sports. On the other hand, if I meet someone and they are a diehard fan of a team that hasn't made the playoffs in 15 years, I don't question their loyalty - I respect their resilience.
Sports only mean something to my friends and I because we collectively pay attention to it. One of my friends in college was a fan of a team that won a championship while we were at school. The next season, his team didn't make the playoffs. I asked him how the championship felt in comparison to how he feels now. He said, "Winning doesn't even feel good, it's just a relief". I've thought a lot about that since he said that. We expect so much of our teams that when they win it doesn't even feel good, it's almost expected given how much effort we put into following them. Winning isn't just joy - it's survival.
For something that people seemingly invest so much time and energy in to, what is there to get out of it? In a time when it can feel hard to connect with people, there is something refreshing about meeting someone that is a fan of one of your teams and instantly bonding with them. Even if they are a fan of a different team in the same league, you still have a common denominator for discussion. A couple of months ago, I was in a bar with some friends, and we started naming every NBA Finals matchup from the last 40 years. It made me realize: what else in life sparks instant connection with a stranger given so little context? “Remember that point guard?” “Yeah, he was good.” “Yeah he was.” That’s all it takes. And sometimes, that’s enough.
Will I stop letting sports influence my mental well being? No. But I hope you understand now exactly why I want my team to beat your team so damn bad.
As first seen in Better On Vinyl Issue 2 Vol 2